>> Wednesday, August 20
Tonight was Church Conference - my church's monthly business meeting. That sounds like such an oxymoron to me - "church business". After all, I left the business world to enter the church world. I've come to realize since venturing into my calling of a ministry position (a menial one in some people's eyes perhaps, but it IS a ministry without a doubt), that church isn't all wine & roses. (Or I should say grape juice and Easter lilies?).
The main discussion tonight didn't get ugly, didn't get out of hand, didn't reek of anger, but I lost my focus somewhere in the middle of it. The focus, of course, being Jesus. I was back in the world, trying to hammer out details in my mind, wanting more than anything simply to understand the changes being proposed. I probably spent too much time whispering with my husband & asking him questions. I find this kind of action rude, to say the least, in people, and I hate that I was doing it mself.
I'm only now recalling a cry to the Lord I shared with the member who cooks our Wednesday dinners - 'UNITY! UNITY! UNITY IN THIS BODY". We denounced demons and declared the Name above all Names. There was indeed unity in the meeting tonight. There was no open hostility. But as I sat outside on my deck tonight talking to God, I realized that I probably fussed a bit too much. The details will sort themselves out -- IF we focus on the main thing. Jesus.
Forgive me My Lord, for losing sight of you you in the minutia of your business. Help me not to get bogged down by details, but instead to seek your face and just trust you.